relaxed和relaxing在某些意义上的区别和其它的-ed 形容词和 –ing 形容词是一样的。
1. relaxed 指人（偶尔指事物）本身就是“轻松的，放松的，松弛的;悠闲的，安心的，安静的；自在的，冷静的，镇定的，从容的，自然的，不加以拘束的”。例如：
He looked relaxed and elegant and had the patina of success.
他神态轻松潇洒，给人成功的印象。
She had a very relaxed manner.
她的举止特别自然。
He appeared relaxed and confidence before the match. 比赛前，他显得镇定而自信。
She was in a relaxed, confident mood.
她的心态从容而自信。
He looked relaxed and totally in command of himself.
他看起来很轻松，有绝对的自信完全能控制住自己。
She had a very relaxed manner. 她的举止特别自然。
Rowling is completely relaxed about this arrangement.
罗琳对这样的安排感觉完全自在（或无所谓）。
I take a fairly relaxed attitude towards what the kids wear to school.
孩子穿什么上学，我觉得无所谓。
As soon as I had made the final decision, I felt a lot more relaxed.
我一作出最后的决定就感到轻松多了。
The atmosphere at lunch was relaxed.
午餐的气氛很轻松。
Jennifer wasn't yet totally convinced that she'd profit from a more relaxed lifestyle
珍尼弗还不完全相信更轻松的生活方式会对她有好处。
Pale wooden floors and plenty of natural light add to the relaxed atmosphere
淡色木地板和充足的自然光平添了几分轻松的氛围。
He adopted a relaxed pose for the camera.
他摆了个悠闲的姿势拍照。
I prefer the relaxed pace of life in the country.
我喜爱乡间那悠闲的生活节奏。
2. relaxing 意为“有助于人休息的;放松的;轻松的，令人放松的”， 意指relaxing所修饰的事物都是具有令人放松的特性。
例如：
a relaxing drink / walk / evening 令人放松的一杯饮料 / 一次散步 / 一个夜晚
I find cooking very relaxing.
我发现烹饪可以令人非常放松。
If you need some help slowing down, turn on relaxing music.
如果你需要放慢速度，可以听点令人放松的音乐。
Cool colors such as blue, purple, and green are relaxing colors.
蓝色、紫色和绿色等冷色是令人放松的颜色。
It's a relaxing car to drive long distance.
这辆轿车跑长途，开起来很轻松。
I'm going to spend the weekend just relaxing.
这个周末，我什么也不干，就是休息。
I spent a few hours quietly relaxing.
我怡然自得地轻松了几个小时。
Muscular aches and pains can be soothed by a relaxing massage.
做放松按摩可以减轻肌肉疼痛。
De-stress yourself with a relaxing bath.
舒舒服服洗个澡放松一下。